What is a good brand of camera and what should one look for when buying , as I know nothing about them ?

My scounting days may be number , as they now around here are frowning on good folks downing nice cold PBRs in the timbers these days , might of been cause "yours truly " called 911 reporting a very large pink elephant running around the western part of The Tall Corn State or when those looking for artifacts discovered a whole semi load of beer cans in one place !

Please tell me your thoughts .