addicted to bowhunting.

Discussion in 'Jokes Forum' started by Huya, Sep 28, 2007.

  1. Huya

    Huya Senior Member

    155
    0
    0
    Hooked on Bowhunting

    You put on a safety harness to change the light bulb.
    You have a camo tent over your bed.
    You have winches hooked to every vehicle including your kid’s tricycle.
    Your vehicle horn is an elk call.
    Your new set of glasses comes with range finder built in.
    You can only sit at one half of your dining table because the other half has 6 bitzenburger fletching jigs mounted to it.
    Your night lights are the deer eyes in your mounts
    Your clothes hangers are bent arrows
    When you talk about your honeymoon it’s vague, we had a good time seen some sights, when you talk about your hunting trip its in detail. Best time of your life, what time you woke up, ate, got to the tree stand, how many deer you seen, who you went with, the weather conditions etc etc etc, Honeymoon conversation over in 15 minutes, hunting trip still talking about it.
    When you can't make it through the day without hearing the words Buck, Arrow, or bow at least once.
    When your wife is trying to get your attention and says dear, you quickly grab bow and binos.
    You put at tree stand in your Christmas tree.
    Your kids warn Santa not to land on your roof.
    You go around the neighborhood shooting the Christmas deer decorations.
    You have a hard time getting up at 6 am to go to work but you are up dressed and out the door at 3 am to hunt.
    You’re afraid of heights but will sit in a tree stand 20 feet off the ground.
    Your board sitting around for more than and hour but you will sit in a tree stand all day.
    You won’t take your wife out to eat because it is only 50 degrees outside but you will go hunting at -10.
    You start measuring everything in yardage.
    You put a tree stand on the chimney for practice in the off season.
    You strategically set up the furniture for best view out the windows.
    You have an 8 pt buck head in the bathroom for a towel rack
    You totally understand this 70#@29DL306fps350g/w80gBH.and consider it a complete sentence yet it takes you 3 times per page of reading to figure out how to hook up the dvd player to the tv.
    You get married in the off season so you don’t have the anniversary during the season.
    You make sure that your kids are born in the off season for the same reason above.
    You don’t know your neighbors but the local archery shop calls you by first name.
    Your house looks like a museum of wildlife.
    You have more magazines dealing with hunting then the local book store.
    People come to visit you and ask if you’re a taxidermy.
    These are just a few of the better ones I have come up with or have read from another sight I am sure you can add to them, But at least you may get a chuckle out of them, Especially if you find your guilty of a lot of them.
     
  2. Liv2Bowhunt

    Liv2Bowhunt Senior Member

    179
    0
    0
    I Resemble Those Remarks! Sweet
     

  3. lungcutter

    lungcutter Senior Member

    832
    0
    0
    I laughed! My wife, not so much.
     
  4. Dredly

    Dredly Site Guru

    4,358
    3
    0
    Some more :)

    Your wife refers to herself as a "Hunting Widow"
    You have more then 4000 posts on Archery forums
    You can tell the difference between Realtree HD, Realtree HD AP, Realtree, and about 30 other kinds of camo... and you own a piece of at least 5 different patterns

    You have a "Bow Rack", a "Hunting Clothing Rack", a "Equipment Rack" and all your normal clothes are stuck in some dresser somewhere

    You have multiple different solutions for scent elimination... and your basement still stinks
     
  5. Huya

    Huya Senior Member

    155
    0
    0
    All your writing tools are made out of broken arrow shafts.
    When your talking about speed it is fps not horsepower.
    You understand what fps is.
    You complain about spending more than 20 dollars on a pair of dress pants but willingly spend over a hundred on camo clothing.
    When Archery equipment is considered a household living expense.
    When you garage sounds like a local zoo because your practicing all your calls for the upcoming season.
    When you can tell how many points a deer is by looking at it but you can’t balance your check book.
    When you paint the decoys yearly but you haven’t painted your house in 10yrs.

    (in reply to
     
  6. Werd

    Werd Senior Member

    1,230
    0
    0
    :laugh: ohhhhh boy....im not getting married.