Old is

Discussion in 'Jokes Forum' started by MoSkeeter0311, Jul 4, 2008.

  1. MoSkeeter0311

    MoSkeeter0311 New Member

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    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs
    and make love,' and you answer,
    'Pick one; I can't do both!'


    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    Your friends compliment you
    on your new alligator shoes
    and you're barefoot.


    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    A sexy babe catches your fancy
    and your pacemaker opens the garage door,

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    Going braless
    pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    You don't care where your spouse goes,
    just as long as you don't have to go along.

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    'Getting a little action'
    means you don't need to take any fiber today.

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    'Getting lucky' means you find your car
    in the parking lot.

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    An 'all nighter' means not getting up
    to use the bathroom.

    AND

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    You are not sure these are jokes?



    EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 50


    Begin by standing on a comfortable surface where you have plenty of room
    at each side.
    With a 5-lb. potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out
    from your sides, and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a
    full minute, and then relax.
    Each day you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit
    longer.


    After a couple weeks, move up to 10-lb. potato sacks.
    Then try 50-lb. potato sacks. Then eventually try to get to where you
    can lift a 100-lb. potato sack in each hand, and hold your arms straight
    for more than a full minute.
    (I'm at this level.)


    Once you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each sack.
     
    Last edited: Jul 4, 2008
  2. pred8er

    pred8er He who eats fuzzy animals

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    Whewh, :whoo: I'm not "old" yet. At least by those definitions! :laugh: